As Told By Kajitsu
by Tenshi-Hikari
Summary: The life of a normal girl in a not-so-normal village. See what goes in the life of Kaba Kajitsu (OC) and her friends (both OC). And the pairings? Time shall tell... :) Original character-warning for those whom do not like from OC's.
1. Shoppingtrips and new books

Hello! I noticed that many fics in Naruto are something like this: There is this über-Mary-Sue-kunoichi that knows every damn powerful move in the book, blah blah blah... There are exceptions, though. Here's my version of a normal girl's life in Konohagakure, as told by Kajitsu. Enjoy! Oh yeah, and I'll send Pakkun and Gamabunta after the evil flamers. Ho ho ho.

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, don't bitch about it to me. I **do own** Kaba Kajitsu (OC), Toya Yui (OC) and Hanahime Mayu (OC), so no stealy!

* * *

"Kajitsu! Up! NOW!" I heard someone shout. I groan and turn to my right, and fall back to sleep. 

"KAJITSU!" I hear again, this time next to my ear. I swear, the woman I call my mother is going to make me deaf.

"I'M UP!" I shout back and glare at my mother. She's a nice woman, during the daytime. On mornings and nights... Ech. The woman that stands before me, her hands on her hips and glares me with equal strenght has black hair, pulled up onto a bun, brown eyes and she stands about 5"7'. She's wearing what any mother wears at... 11 in the morning: A green T-shirt, simple green pants and a white apron. She's also wearing white socks.

"Kajitsu, I understand that it's weekend, you don't have to work today and you're 20, but could you PLEASE do what you promised?" She asked and sighed deeply. What did I... Oh yeah! Shopping!

"Yes, mother, just gimme a sec to do my rituals." I said and dragged my body from my bed. I stood up, towering over mother. Yeah, I'm a "one tall bitch", as my friends put it. I'm about 5"10'. I think I got that gene from my father. I usher my mother out of my room, and go to my closet. I pick up a tanktop with a leaf on it in dark green, and the top is dark grey. I also take out my deep green capris and my dear hoodie-jacket, also dark green. I like earthy colors, so sue me blind and call me grandma. I take a glimpse at myself from my long mirror. Medium build, some muscles, a bit curly, hazel-colored hair and brown eyes. Tan complex and about a C-cup. Few things I hate about me: My freckles and my glasses. I'm about as blind as a mute bat in a dark cave and I have a small amount of freckles on my face, across my nose and a little below both of my eyes. I stuck my tongue out to my reflection and watch it mimic me. I had slept in baby-blue sphagetti-strap top and baby-blue shorts.

So, I take my towel and swagger to the bathroom door. I try the handle. It opens, and I go in. No one's there, so I take off my PJs and turn on the shower. I wait for a while for the water to be the right temperature, and then slip in. The warm water cascades down my body, washing my waryness off. After about 15 minutes of showering, I turn it off and pick up my towel. I dry my hair and then the rest of my body. I take my black robe and wrap myself into it. Reaching to the cabinet, I take out my toothbrush, wet it, put some minty toothpaste in it and brush my teeth. Has anyone ever noticed that you look like you have rabies every time you brush your teeth? Putting the toothbrush away and spitting the paste away, I take the blowdryer and try to dry my thick hair. My hand tries to find a brush as I gaze my reflection. I find it and begun to brush my hair clear from knots. It went okay. Until I felt my hand leave my hair too easily. I look at my brush, or what's left of it. The heavy sensation in my hair means only one thing. The brush broke again. In my hand is the handle of the brush, and in my hair is the brush-part of the brush. Sighing, I tear the brush out of my hair and put it back into the handle, looking as sour as possible.

After I blow-dried my hair dry (and broke the brush extra 2 times) I walked to my room. Throwing the robe off, I slipped into my black undergarments and put on some deodorant. Putting on my capris and my shirt, I tie the belt-ribbons in my capris close and put on my hoodie. After putting my hair on a high ponytail and putting on my round glasses, I head downstairs. After mom practically showed some toast and orange juice down my throath, she hands me the shoppinglist and some money. I asked whether I could buy a new brush and some candy, she agreed. I said good-mornings and good-byes to my father, slipped on my flip-flops, took my keys and slinked out of the door. I found myself facing the bustling streets of Konohagakure, the ninja-village. Behind me is my family's shop, a restaurant. On the sign, there read with big, cat-sized letters: "Kaba no inshokuten" (Kaba's Restaurant.). Kinda lame. I was going to say we'd name it "The Dragon's Birch" or something like that. Yeah, that was lame too.

"Hi, girl!" I said as my mixed breed dog Tsume barked from her doghouse. She was about the size of a German shepard, and looked like on too, except she was earth brown with black things on her fur. Her foodbowl and waterbowl are filled, so I leave and enter the streets. The Konohagakure is a nice place, but I can't help but feel paranoid with all the ninjas around. I turn to a deserted street and walk forth, my hands shoved into my pantpockets and my empty shoppingbag on my arm. I swear I heard someone else's footsteps on the pavement. I turn my head around, and I see a kid who hurriedly masks himself under some fabric, assuming that he's actually blending with the road.

_'Seriously, who does he think he's cheating?' _I think and my eye twitches. After I began walking again, I heard the kid again. This time I spun around completely, and saw the kid trying to mask himself into a fence, holding up a cloth. The planks in the cloth went horizontally, while the real planks went vertically. Again, my eye twitched.

"Hey kid, who do you think you're kidding with that?" I asked and raised an eyebrow at him.

"Impressive, you saw through my disguise without even being a ninja." He mused and peeled himself off the fence.

"So I've decided; You can hang with me today!" He said and pointed at me. Snort.

"Uh, no offence, kid, but I have errands to run, so..." I said and pointed behind me and began walking backwards. Since I really don't have any eyes in the back o' my head, I backed right into someone. Owch. Definetly a ninja. I felt like I just walked into a frickin' brickwall. Fearing the worst, my head turns around and is met with a stern face. He has sunglasses, he is wearing an all-blue uniform and (fuck no!) a hitai-ate. Greaaat.

"Eh, Gomenasai." I said and lifted my left hand as a gesture of sorry-ness. "I'll just be going now..." Laughing nervously, I go around him and start moving again. Only to run into someone else.

"Oh, for fuck's sake!" I groan outloud as I peel myself off the person. Infront of me was a man with his hitai-ate tied like a bandanna over his head, a straw in his mouth and a jounin attire.

"What the fuck's today? The official 'annoy-the-shit-outta-Kajitsu'-day or something?" I ask and yet again, my eye twitches. I seem to like the word "fuck" these days...

"Sorry, I didn't mean to be on your way." The guy says and lifts his hands infront of him to gesture surrendering, smiling.

"Sure ya didn't." I mutter under my breath and walk around him and continue my walking. After walking a feet or so, I feel as though someones watching me. I stop.

"You three, eyes off the ass, now." I say, and turn my head to see the three males. They all seem to be watching something else, other than my butt. Snort. All I wanted to do is go shopping, damnit, but _noooo_, I literally run into two ninjas and have to stand for their intrest in female body. Argh. After the alley ends, I take a turn right and continue to the market. I enter and the small bell jingles. Everyone turns to stare at me. I notice that the whole damn shop is full of ninjas. Yay, that's all this Kajitsu needs! More ninjas! Digging up the shoppinglist, I browse through the list. I was going to do it on the way here, but some people decided to grace me with their presence... Let's see... Tomatoes, noodles, onions, cucumber, milk, bamboo, seaweed, sake, dishwasher soap, trashbags... And my brush and chocolate. I grab a basket and begin to assemble these ingredients into the basket. I also grab some ice cream. It's one of those fruit-flavoured and long one. I go to the cashier and show them the ice cream, and pile my stuff on to the counter. I unwrap the ice cream, and proceed into eating it. I lick it and suck it a little.

"Maa, that feels so good!" I say happily and lick it again.

"I bet it does." The cashier, my friend Yui says and smirks.

"Uh-huh..." I say in a dreamy voice and lick it even more suggestively. Yui erupts into laughters, and I glance around the shop. All the guys are loking at me weirdly, and swallowing. I look back at Yui, and she shoots a glance at me, we both spelling out 'are-you-thinking-what-I'm-thinking'. I wink and bite my bottom lip.

"So when do you get off, Yui-chan?" I ask and put the ice cream into my mouth.

"Later, somewhere around 4 p.m." She says and slides the onions through the cashregister.

"Oh, but I can't wait that long! I wanna do a re-run of our night a little while ago!" I whine.

"Aww, you'll just have to, dear..." She says and smiles suggestively. Need I say that inside we are both laughing our heads off.

"Fine, fine. How 'bout tonight? I have the chocolate sauce and the other things. You bring the whipped cream and I'll see if Mayu-chan will get the fudge" I reply and steal a glance around the shop. O ho ho, we are so good at this! The expressions on the men's faces are priceless!

"Okay!" She says and I smirk.

"Laters, I'll go check on Mayu. If she agrees, we'll have fun threesome!" With the wave of my hand, I'm out of the store. I walk on the streets, and towards the bookshop. That's where I work, but right now, I'm on a small weekend-holiday. And again, people look at me funnily as I walk on the streets and eat my ice cream. I finish it, and leave the stick into my mouth. It's fun to chew the stick, so sue me. Upon entering the shop, Mayu greets me happily. Guess she was bored.

"Kajitus-chaaaan! What's uuuup!" Yikes. Guess hyperactivity and bookstores are not a match.

"Nothing much, Mayu-chan. Just shopping for mom. Any new books?"

"Yeah, one you might like. It's the new volume of Come Come Paradise." She says in a sing-along-voice. Yes, about time! May it sound strange, but I actually like those novels. Yes, they might be perverted, but still. We've had many good arguments with my friends wether some pose is actually possible.

"Oh goody! Can I have one? Pweeease?" Cutesy-face attack!

"Okay, you can have one copy. You've work hard enough. Here, have fun!" She says and hands the book over.

"Oh yeah, tonight at my place, MAJOR movie-night. You bring the fudge, I already have the ice cream and chocolate sauce. Yui-chan brings the whipped cream. Deal?"

"Okay! I'll come around 6 p.m, okay?"

"Okay!" I hug her, and then leave the store. I flip the book open and start to read it. As strange as it may sound, I dodge better when I'm reading. Nothing ever happens to me, I always get away in time. Fingering the stick in my mouth, I walk along the pavement, nose buried into the book. I don't know what's coming towards me, but it's coming fast.

"Look out!" I hear someone shout, but I take no action. As the object is about to hit me, I just grab it. I keep reading the book, flip the page, walk forth and scratch my head with the hand I caught the object into. Ahh, another physical impossibility in the book... Hold it, what did I catch? I tear my gaze out of my book, and look at my hand.

"Shit!" I shout and drop the object in my hand. It was a kunai. I stare at the object as it lay on the pavement, circling it like a cat circles a plate of hot porridge.

"Shit, fuck! Damn! Fucking hell! Oh, man!" My colorful language takes it's lead again. Tucking my book into the safety of my shopping bag, I pick it up again, shakily.

"Okay, who threw this!" I shout and look around. There are about three kids there. All ninjas. Great!

"I reckon it was one of you?" I ask and my eye twitches again. A raven haired boy steps up.

"So what if it was?"

"Now personally, I detest violence. But!" I start and walk to the boy. I bow to his eyelevel.

"If I ever see you throwing these things anywhere near me, I will shove one up your ass, rip your arms off and beat you to death with them! Have a nice day!" I conjur my most venomous voice and drop the kunai. I straighten up, and begin to walk away, flipping my book open. Just then, I hear a 'poof'-sound.

"Don't you dare to talk to Sasuke-kun like that!" I hear a girl shriek. Agh... A fangirl.

"Sasuke-kun, I really don't think she was kidding." A man says and I turn around. A new guy just got to the group. A tall man with silver hair in an impossible angle, his face practically covered up, just standing there, reading Come Come Paradise.

"Oi, Kakashi, she reads the same book you do!" The blonde boy says and points at me.

"The same book? No, no no no, this is the** new book**. That's the **older** one." I say and flip a page.

"Eh? The new one's out?" The man asked and looked at me.

"Yup, just got mine."

"Then that means that you are a pervert, like Kakashi!" The blonde shouts again and all the eyes are on me. I look at them, and then stroke my chin as if I'm thinking.

"Maa, pervert is such a strong word... I prefer 'admirer of human body' better. Toodle-loo!" I wave and begin to walk away. Still intrigued by the book, I keep reading, and...

"Can I help you?" I ask and stop. Right there behind me stands the man with silver hair, looking over my shoulder at my book. He grins sheepishly (or at least I think he does) and scratches the back of his head.

"Can I read that?" He asks and points at my book. And we're walking, we're walking...

"Nuh-uh! I'm in the middle of it!"

"Pleaaase?"

"No."

"Just a little peek?"

"No, go buy your own."

"Miss, I'm just a simple jounin..."

"...With higher salary than I have."

"I help keep this village safe?"

"Along with the other 1000 or so ninjas."

"I can carry your groceries?"

"You have a team to take care of."

"But they look so heavy..."

"I'm not weak, thank-you!"

"How 'bout I buy it from you?"

"No, go get your own copy from the shop over there."

"Hey! You!" Agh, I think I reckognise that voice... Indeed, the small kid from earlier was standing right infront of me. No, god, no...

"What's it now, pipsqueek?" The blonde boy begins to snicker behind me.

"I found you!" ...

"...I wasn't hiding."

"I found you anyways!" That does it. I picked the kid up from his collar, move him to my left and let go. He fell to the ground with a thud.

"Itai.."

"How dare you treat Konohamaru-kun, the grandson of the third Hokage like this!" Oh, god, not another one.

"... 'Cause I can?"

"Hey, I like her attitude!" I hear the blonde boy say, and I hear a rather painful sound of a fist colliding with a head and some whining.

"And young women your age do not need this kind of crap." He says and yanks my volume of Come Come Paradise away from my hands. After a while of silence I turn to the silverhaired man.

"Could you hold my groceries? Thanks." I say and hand over the back. And back to the shades.

"Now. You can try to insult me, you can try to lecture me and you can try and mess with my mind, BUT YOU DON'T MESS WITH THE BOOK!"

* * *

"Aah, that felt so good!" I say and rub my sore knuckles. Infront of me lies the body of the man, beaten rather badly, and in my hand is my beloved book. Turning around, I see the shocked faces of the people around me. What?

"Dad's been training me in kung-fu since I was able to walk." I quickly explain and gesture the tall man to hand me the bag. He does, and I begin to walk away. I hum happily; heck I think I just release my stress into that guy.

"**KABA KAJITSU!**" I hear someone shout and I gringe. Oh, boy, storm front approaching.

"Yes, mother!" I shout back.

"I saw you fighting that ninja! Do you have a death-wish!" Mom shouted and ran at me.

"Mom, chill."

"Chill? CHILL? I'LL SHOW YOU CHILL, YOU LITTLE...!"

"AIEE!" And thus, this little piggy went 'eek, eek, eek' all the way home.

* * *

Well, what did you think? Again, I can't promise that I'd heed all the ratings. Wait for the next chapter of:

**As told by Kajitsu! **creepy echo-effect

Good night!


	2. Sleepover!

**A/N:** Hiya! Tenshi-Hikari here! Here's the next installment of my story, As Told By Kajitsu.

**Disclaimer: **Same as always, I only own mah own characers. Hands off! This chapter might be a little boring, but it might help. Review if you have the energy. Again, Pakkun and Gamabunta shall torture you if you begin to flame my story. Critique is welcome, but straight-out bitching and bashing isn't.

Dear **Kumo Kunoichi:** Thanks, and I'm afraid to say that the spat over Come Come Paradise doesn't continue. On this chapter. On the third one, in the other hand... Ho ho ho. But there is another minor fight on this one too.

Dear **Anything**: Thank you, I thought it might stand out of the other OC-fics.

* * *

"Noooo! Please nooo!" I whined and shook my head. 

"YES!" Mayu and Yui chorused.

"Have mercy on my pitiful soul! Not the sappy romance-flicks!" I beg and clasp my hands together as if praying.

"YEES! BWAHAHAHAA!" They both laughed manically and bounced about.

"Fine, fine, but only if I can pick up a few movies o' my taste." They nodded and scurried happily to the adventure and horror sections of the video rentals.

"This and this!" I shouted and pulled out two movies.

"Parental advisory on both of them?" Mayu asked and glared at me.

"Oh, honey, you're old enough." I said and grinned happily.

"If you lose the super angsty-one, we lose the uber-fluffy one, deal?" Saluting, I put the super-angsty-one back to the shelf and Mayu put the uber-fluffy romance-flick away (after a strain of words that would make the roughest sailor blush in embarrasment).

"Okay, let's check these babies out!" Yui shouts and we agree loudly. We get along great!

Why? Well, there's a legend my mom told me when I was smaller. She said that every person has star sisters or -brothers. All three are born the same day, same exact moment and they all have one name incommon. All three of these persons feel eachother's emotions if they concentrate hard enough, and the personalities are very similar, though there are some traits that make them differ. Well, Mayu and Yui are my "Celestial Sisters", as we call our small group. We all share our middle name, Hoshiko. While I'm the tallest of the group, Mayu is the shortest. She measures 5"6', and Yui measures 5"8'. My hair reaches just a little below my shoulders, Yui's hair is short and cut boy-style, and Mayu has long hair to her butt. My hair is brown, Yui's is orange and Mayu's is blonde. Same with the eyes: My eyes are brown, Yui's are green and Mayu's are blue. They are both pretty normal-looking. Our personalities? We all have very, VERY twisted sence of humor and we all love to eat. I'm pretty down-to-earth-kind gal, Yui is a bit of a hot-head and Mayu's an airhead. And, as the above suggests, I hate all the chick-stuff, but my two cooky companions love it.

"Oof!" Yet again, I hit a person. But wait, this time I know that person.

"Maa, it's Wara! What's up?"

"Oh-ho, it's you!" The guy says. Yep, it's the guy I ran into this morning. The guy with the straw and all.

"Look, uh... I wanted to apologize my behaviour this morning. That kid got me ticked off and mom woke me up on a unholy hour."

"And when did she wake you up?"

"... About half-an-hour before I ran into you." The man laughs at my response.

"The name's Shiranui Genma. And you are?" He holds out his hand. I grab it and shake it.

"Kaba Kajitsu. Nice to meet you. Now, if you'll excuse me, it's girl's night in, so..." I say and leave with a dramatic bow. And I was bombarded with questions.

"Who was he?"

"Where did you meet him?"

"When did you meet him?"

"Is he single?"

"Mayu!" A sweatdrop appeared over mine and Yui's heads. Of course Mayu asked that. She crushes on anyone that might be cute in her opinion.

"One: The guy is called Shiranui Genma. Two: I met him when I ran into him. Three: I met him this morning. Four: How the fuck should I know? Let's just go and have the movie-night, okay?"

"Haaai!"

* * *

"Yui-chan, you're such a great cook!" I shouted and munched on my ice cream a lá Yui. It had 4 scoops of vanilla ice cream, chocolate sauce, fudge, waffles, sprinkles and whipped cream. 

"Yeah, and you look _soooo_ adorable in that apron!" Mayu muses and eats a bite out of her portion. Same as mine, only with chocolate ice cream scoops.

"Ha ha." Yui laughed sarcastically and grabbed her ice cream bowl. She picked strawberry as her flavour of the night. She took off her apron and slouched around with her bowl, wearing bright red tanktop and black pants with cute kitties with bowties in it and her hair was still the same boycut and naturally in a dissarray. This time I'm in my shorts and T-shirt, my hair up on a bun, and Mayu had picked out candy-striped shirt with matching shorts and her hair on a braid. We all ventured upstairs, to my room. No fear of my parent's seeing me; they're visiting my aunt's cousin's daughter's brother-in-law's aunt's daughter's children's godfather, twice removed... Or something like that. Who ever it is, they're out for about a week or so. Hallelujah.

"Soo, horror-flick or lovey-dovey-flick?" I ask, dreading the answer.

"The horror-flick."

Silence.

"Nani?"

"Yeah, you heard me." Yui said and rolled her eyes.

"Y'see, if we watch the horror-flick first, all the nasty things will go away from our minds as we watch the chick-flick." Mayu reasons. We reach my bedroom and walk in.

"Sissies." I mutter under my breath, but let them watch the horror-flick first. Man, it sucked. I giggled like a maniac to the gore and "special effects" as my other friends seemed to be rather shaken up by the movie. Somewhere near the end we heard a strange noice in the kitchen. I swear, Yui and Mayu should loose weight, I was nearly crushed under these two girls. They jumped on me. Ow...

"W-what was that?" Mayu asks, frightened.

"I-I don't know!" Yui panicks and is cutting my air supply.

"Yui... Need... AIR!" I gasp and toss them both offa me.

"Kajitsu, go see what it is!"

"Why me!"

"Your house!"

"Fine!" I shout and grab my bo-stick. Just as I am at the door, I turn around.

"You know, the evil murderer usually sneaks on the girls that stay behind..." I trail off and smirk. A moment of silence, and another noise comes from downstairs.

"WAIT FOR US!" Victory!

As the girls walk closely behind me, holding the back of my shirt and me, clutching to the bo with my knuckles white. Well, I think so. Too dark to see, actually. My heart is beating faster than an exhausted shrew's, but I don't care, I have to be the brave one. We all walk (stumble) to the livingroom as quietly as possible and Yui fingers the lightswitch. I get ready to strike, as Yui flips the lightswitch. My swing hits the target, accompanied with a slight shout from me (HII-YAH!) and a groan from the target.

"Oww..."

Silence. Again.

"Wara? I mean, Shiranui-kun?"

"Man, that hurt..." He says and looks up from his place on the floor. "Then again, it might have been worth it."

"Hello! Remember me?" I hear someone say, and LO AND BEHOLD: As if my suffering could not increase any more, before me stood the same silver-haired guy who shares my... "Passion" for Come Come Paradise.

"...What are you two doing here?" Gimme the wrong answer, bub, and I shall smite thee down with my all-mighty bo-stick.

"Your parents hired us to look after you." Shiranui-kun said and got up, slightly rubbing his head. I smiled sheepishly, then turned back to the raving lunatic-mode.

"Then why in seven hells didn't you use the door?"

"I told you we should've used the door." My heroes, damnit.

"Eh, who were you again?" I asked and gestured towards the silver-haired jounin.

"Me? Hatake Kakashi." He answers and his eye reveals him grinning. I gesture him to follow and go to the kitchen. After making sure no one's hearing (aka, Mayu's harassing Shiranui-kun and Yui is trying to save him) I turn around and put my hands on his shoulders.

"Thank you for showing up when you did."

"Eh?"

"They were trying to torture me with a chick-flick." My answer resulted an amused nod from his part.

"Torture you!"

"Fuuck..." I groaned and slumped.

"You promised you'd watch it if you'd get that horror-movie of yours!" Mayu shouts and jumps on me. I struggle playfully.

"Ahh, a kodak-moment." Yui says from the doorway, smirking at me and Mayu. We stop, look at eachother, and then Yui. We both grin manically.

"No, wait, no, not now, please no..." Yui tries as Mayu and me start running towards her. She runs, but we tackle her down and begin an all-out tickle-war, much to the guy's pleasure, I believe. After we decided to end it (I managed to sit on both of them, hee hee!), we heard a knock from the door. I went ot open it, and saw the three kids I met earlier today, with backpacks slung on their shoulders, looking at me strangely.

"Slumber PARTY!" I heard Mayu shriek somewhere in the backround, and grimaced.

"Lemme guess, you're here in the mission to look after me for a week?" I asked and tried not to grab Mayu and throw her out.

"Hai!" The girl shouted.

"Okay, get in and change into your jammies, we're gonna have fun tonight." I said and gestured them in.

* * *

The sniveling and the constant tearing of paper were slowly making me nuts. Sakura (the kunoichi), Yui and Mayu were sitting infront of the TV, sobbing at the sappy romance movie. I snort and turn the page of my novel. After hitting page 88, I grew bored and stashed the book (don't ask me how) and walked to Shiranui-kun and Hatake-kun. They were playing Go. Man, Hatake-kun was loosing big time. I snickered as I watched Genma place another white stone. 

"What?" Kakashi asked and looked at me.

"You're loosing badly."

"Oh, and I suppose you'd win this?"

"Even a novice could win this game. Scoot over."

"No."

"Genma? Can I help him?"

"Sure."

"Ya hear? Move."

"No."

"Fine." And with that, I sat on his lap and took a black stone, placing it on the board.

"What are you-"

"Helping you, now shush, I need to concentrate into kicking Shiranui-kun's ass."

"Oi, Kajitsu-chan, isn't too early to give him a lapdance?" I hear Yui shouting from in front of the TV. Don't even look at her, just flip her off and place another pebble on the _goban_. Genma raises an eyebrow at my move, and places his own. Back and forth, back and forth, the even clicking sound echoes in the (almost)silent house. I think we were playing for about 10 minutes, max, when I suddenly jump up and punch the air. Thank God nothing happened while I was sitting on Hatake-kun. I think... I**_ hope._**

"Ha! Victory! In your face Hatake! Hah!"

"SHHH!"

"Mou, you guys are no fun."

"We are trying to watch this movie, so shut it." Mayu shouts and remains glued in the screen. I stick my tongue out, and just then, Mayu turns around and shoots me a death-glare. I quickly tuck my tongue back into my mouth and just glare back. Mayu then turns back to the screen.

"I'll go get Tsume in."

... No response.

"I'll be going then."

... Nothing.

"Whatever." Grabbing my jacket and flipflops, I open the door and walk to the yard. About half-way to Tsume's house...

"OI!"

"YAARGH!" And I fell on my butt. In front of me was the blonde kid. Tsume rose from her place on the ground and peered at me curiously. Yeah, a real gal's best friend, willing to risk her life to defend mine.

"Damnit, kid, you scared me!"

"Sorry!" He looks really down, and I feel my conciense knocking in my head. Hah, bashing my brain with a sledgehammer is more like it.

"It's okay." I said and walked to Tsume. I unhooked her leash from the doghouse and patted her head.

"So what were you doing outside?" I asked and looked at the blonde boy, Naruto.

"I was scouting for enemy ninja!"

"Heh, good to know you're eagar to protect me." Naruto smiles, and I ruffle his hair. I can't help it, the kid's like the little brother I never had.

"Tell you what, since that sappy movie might have ended already, I'll make some food for us?"

"Okay!"

"And you're gonna decide what we're having."

"Really?"

"Yup."

"Can you do ramen?"

"Name the flavour and I can cook it."

"Yay! Thank you!" Naruto jumped on me and hugged me. I hugged back and grinned. He's so adorable! Little did I know that someone was watching us from a crystal ball, smiling...

"Yui, Mayu! Huddle!" I shout and let my dear dog run loose in the house. She jumps and tackles Hatake-kun under her body. I snicker and recieve a really nasty glare from him, which I counter by sticking my tongue out. Yui and Mayu arrive (with tears in their eyes. Seriously, why do they keep torturing themselves with these movies?) and we huddle together to think about what to do.

"I promised Naruto-kun we'd cook ramen."

"Where are we **sob** going to cook?" Mayu asks. I hand her a hankie, which she takes.

"Well, the restaurant kitchen is always open..." The mischievous twinkle in my eyes is soon copied by my friend's, and we straighten up.

"Okay, everyone! Follow me!" I shout and start to walk towards the restaurant-part of our house.

* * *

**A/N: **Okay, that was that episode of (drumroll) 

**As Told By Kajitsu!** (echo-effect)

Bye!

:D

PS: Oh yeah, can you already guess few of the pairings? ;)


	3. On Nights Like These

**A/N: **Okay, this chapter might not be so good: I was writing it half-asleep and during the night. But, anyways, have fun!

**Disclaimer**: Ah, fuck it, ya know the drill already.

Dear **loveable-M**: Kajitsu is pronounced something like kah-jih-tsu, and really fast. That sounds about right... I think the timeline is post the war of Sound and further from that. Or AU, where everything is peechy-keen. I'm not quite sure yet.

* * *

Haa, here we are, in the restaurant-part of my house. I'm currently cooking ramen for Naruto. Basically, everyone else has a bowl of their own. I decided to wear one of those cooky chéf-hats chéfs wear. Uchiha keeps eyeing me strangely every now and then... Suppose the fact that I threathened to beat him to death with his own arms has anything to do with it? 

"Here you go, Naruto! Beef-ramen!"

"Itadakimasu!" And he digs in. I glance at Kakashi, whom I just gave his portion about a second or two ago. The bowl's empty.

"Gochisosama." He says and nods at me. And the eye twitches...

"You ate it already?"

"Yes?"

"That fast?"

"Yes?"

"You'll get a stomache-ache."

"Aww, so you do care."

"Maybe I'm just being polite?"

"I'm a ninja, I know these things."

"I'm a woman, I know these things better."

"Oh, so?"

"Yes so."

"I have many years of training on my side."

"I've got woman's intuition."

"Good point."

"It is, isn't it?"

"Ah, it's a lovers quarrel." Mayu smirks.

"Screw you."

"Maybe later, I'm pretty tired now." I just squint at her. Shiranui-kun chuckles at the backround, and Yui smirks. Since I have fed everyone in the house (yes, Tsume too) I grab my bowl, sit on a counter, take out my Come Come Paradise and start reading it as I eat.

"It can't be that intresting." Yui says and glares at me. What did I do now?

"Yes it is." Eating ramen and flipping a page.

"Anything good yet?" She asks and looks at the pages in an impossible angle.

"A few physiological impossibilities... Unless you're a yogi, that is."

"Heh." I suddenly yank the book towards Yui and glare at the person infront of me. It was Hatake-kun, smiling sheepishly again. His hand was still in a strange position, as if he had tried to grab it away from me from below.

"I thought I made it clear; you are not getting this!" I shouted and glared at him.

"Please? I'm protecting you, it could be my pay!"

"Folks will pay for the mission once it's over, dumbass."

"Fine, then I won't protect you."

"That still leaves Shiranui-kun, Naruto-kun, Uchiha-kun and Sakura-chan." I reply with a huge smile.

"Pleaaaaase?"

"No. I'm in the middle of it."

"Just a peek?"

"Get your own."

"I know you want to give it to me."

"Read your old one."

"But I've read it 5 times already!"

"Tough shit, buddy."

"I can always steal it from you." He suggests and looks as though he just won our argument. I stare at him for a while, then hide the book into my top, right between my breasts. Beat that, scarecrow!

"Try stealing it from there, bub." I counter, as calmly as I can, while eating more ramen. Yui nearly falls off the counter from laughing, Mayu is on the floor, courtesy of a fit of giggles, Shiranui-kun makes a noice with Naruto, something like 'OoooOOOoooh!', Sakura giggles as well, a little red, and I think I saw a tint of red on Uchiha-kun's face as well. And out of all the things I though Hatake wouldn't do, I see his hand approaching my chest.

**"KYAAA! PERVERT!"**

Slap.

And I made a nice, red handprint to the side of his face. Man, this is fun! Inwardly, the inner-me is doing a victory-dance. Right now, Yui, Mayu and Shiranui-kun are laughing their heads off, while Hatake-kun's team 7 is glaring at their teacher quite disapprovingly.

"Owch." He mutters and rubs his face. My lips form a sadistic grin as my hand is still in a the position it was after I bitch-slapped him.

"That made me feel _soo_ much better!" Wow. Dejá vu!

"Sadistic, aren't you?" He asks and eyes me warily.

"Yes!" I reply with the cutest smile I have and push my glasses a little further up the bridge of my nose.

"I found a movie! Come see!" Sakura-chan shouts. Apparently, she and Mayu decided to raid our video-shelves. Everyone, except me and Hatake-kun leave the kitchen and walk towards the livingroom. Hatake-kun's attention is somewhere else, so I try something. Basically a suicide-attempt, I try it anyways. I silently edge my finger closer to the edge of his mask, then I try to etch it between his skin and the mask. Hey, what facial-products does he use? Before I could do anything, he catches my wrist and looks at me, boredly.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you." He warns and releases my wrist.

"Well, you're not me. And..." I say, put my empty bowl away and hop down from the counter, staring him into his eye, and getting closer. Mere inches are separating our bodies from each other, and I put my index-finger on his mask, right there where I should see his lips.

"One day, I'm going to see what's under that mask of yours... Kakashi-kun..." I whisper and look into his confused eye. I smile, and turn around. After he can't see my face anymore, my smile breaks into a devious smirk and I hurry to the livingroom, my inner-self congratulating my actions, and my heart beating fast. I think I'm toying with my very life in this situation... But why did I do that? Normally I would've just shouted it, from a safe distance... Ah, whatever, I'll think about it later. I walked in and looked at the TV. Oh, goody! Another sappy movie. Aw, man! This bites beyond words. Apparently, Uchiha-kun, Naruto-kun and Shiranui-kun agree; they look bored. So I decide to entertain them.

Not like that!

Just goofing around. I glance at the movie; I've seen mom watch it many times, and I know about half of the lines by heart. So I plop on my couch and begin to re-enact the movie.

_"Oh, Taro, why did you save me?"_ I mouth the words and try to put on my googly-eyes as the main girl whines in the TV.

_"Because... I love you, Nikki." _Acting, acting..._  
_

_"Oh, but my family will never accept us!" _And I act all drama-queen-like, put the back of my hand to my forehead and mouth the words.

_"Let us elope then!" _I mouth again and grasp the air, as if I'm holding someone's hands between mine.

_"Yes, we shall elope and I will spend the rest of my life with you!" _I try to get all sparkly-eyed and look as though I'm about to cry. Now Naruto starts to laugh, Shiranui-kun tries to keep his laughter in and I swear, Uchiha-kun is smirking. Yui, Mayu and Sakura turn at me and glare. I drop my act and sit there, looking like I hadn't moved in five minutes at all.

"What? What? What did I do?" I ask and glare right back.

"You did something, didn't you?" Yui asks and intensifies her glare.

"Just because someone laughs, does it always mean that I'm the culprit?"

"We've known you forever, we know if you're up to something." Mayu pipes in, eyes glued to the screen. Yui turns away from me.

"We'll be keeping an eye on you." She says and I mouth the words, while drawing a lazy circle into the air with my index-finger and mouth "yack, yack, yack" after she's done talking. Now Naruto laughs harder, Shiranui-kun began to laugh and Uchiha-kun has a really hard time keeping his cool. And I hear Hatake-kun chuckling behind me. Tsume walks over to me, seeing that none of the other girls seemed to pay any attention to her. I scratch her behind her ears, and ruffled her fur. I pat the couch seats with my hands.

"Come on, girl! Come on!" I encourage her and she jumps on the couch, lays her head onto my lap and looks content as I run my fingers in her silky fur. She curls up into a small ball and sticks her tongue out. I smile at my dog and rub her head. She sighs and closes her eyes. Times like these allow me to think. I can let my mind wander around, with no real need to concentrate into anything. Things start popping into my head. Why did my parents go on a family visit without me? Why did they hire two jounin and three chuunin to look after me? I'm twenty years old, for goodness' sake! I think I can take care of myself! Why do other people shunn that Naruto-kid so badly? I'm aware of the demon inside of him, but he isn't the demon. Why does everyone keep hating him? Why is Uchiha-kun always sulking? I know it must be really hard for a kid his age to live alone, but still. If he has emotional scars, why doesn't he try and heal them? I can't even imagine what it would feel like to go home and find my parent's murdered... Or my friends... I shake my head to get rid of the images. Tsume looks up at me, her eyes saying everything. She seems to feel my confusion and tries to offer comfort by licking my hand. I smile at her and pat her head.

"Just rest, girl. I'm going to go and think." I say and get up, lowering her head on the sofa. She looks at me, as if asking if I'm sure. I smile at her, and she seems to understand me. She lays down and goes to sleep again. I quietly grab my jacket, watching if anyone notices me. No one seems to, so I slink to the backyard. The cool nightair greets me, and I head to a gigantic tree in the backyard. I start to climb it. After having about my whole lifetime to practice it, I get there easily. I've constructed a small platform in to the tree, on which I climb on to sit. This is my place, my special place rare people know about. There's something magical here; I can see the stars, the moon is shining it's pale light through the leaves of this pear tree on me, fireflies are dancing in our garden... This is nice... Too bad things like these don't last forever. Come to think of it, I wouldn't want them to. If we don't see the downs of life, how can we appreciate the ups? I mean, you've got to at least _try _and find _something _positive in everything!

"Hey." I take a sharp intake of breath and turn my head to my left. Yeah, there stood Hatake-kun. And not methaphorcally speaking, the guy was literally standing there, _attached to the treetrunk._ I let out a breath of relief, and put my right hand on my racing heart.

"Phew, you scared me."

"Sorry. Can I...?" He gestures the platform and I scooch over a bit. He climbs on it and sits next to me. Silence lingers, but this one is the good kind of silence, it's not awkward or anything. We both stare at the nightsky, not really minding the silence.

"So what's under that hitai-ate of yours?" I ask suddenly, still looking up.

"What do you mean?" He counter-questions, his eye looking at me.

"You're hiding something under it. If it was just a regular eye, you wouldn't hold it like that."

"What if this is a fashion-statement?"

"Feh. Have you forgotten? This is a relatively small village. People talk." I say and let out a little laugh.

"Can't argue with that."

"If it's something painful, you don't have to talk." I say and stare back at the moon. Again, silence lands between us. Even though the curiousity is killing me inside, I don't wan't to push it. If he wants to he'll talk. I think.

"You seem to be close to your friends." He changed the subject. That painful, huh?

"Yeah... We're not sisters by blood, but by souls." Small moment of silence.

"God, that sounded so corny, didn't it." I state and let my head drop and hit my knees. Hatake-kun chuckles a bit.

"Yeah, it did." I lift my head again, to see a mostly hidden face. The pale light of fireflies and the moon give his hair an eerie glow, like I think it gives mine too.

"But it's true, every word. We seem to know what we each think. Kinda creepy, but kinda cool at the same time."

"You're strange."

"Hey, the world needs a few of us strange ones to make everyone else look normal."

"Yeah, but I meant the way your personalities change."

"Aw, come on! Even I can't be bitchy all the time." I say and chuckle.

"True." I shift from my pose and lie flat on my stomach.

"Nights are strange, don't you think?" I say, looking down to the fireflies dancing above some flowers.

"Oh?"

"Yeah. Everyone thinks that during the nights, nothing moves, but when you watch closer, you'll see that there just might be more movement then than during days." I prop myself up on my elbows.

"Look, fireflies. You can only see them by night. Those flowers over there?" I say and point at a bush of yellow flowers, eminating a sweet scent.

"Those only open at night. And the bats live during the dark too. All and all, there's something calming and serene in nights."

"This isn't your first time in this tree during nights, is it?" I don't answer, just smile knowingly. Suddenly, I stiffle out a yawn.

"Guess it's way past your bedtime." Hatake-kun chuckles.

"Oh, really? Then what time is it?" Hatake-kun strokes his chin, as in thought and looks slightly up.

"I'd estimate, about 11:34 p.m." I look at my watch.

"I hate it when people do that."

"'People'?"

"... Okay, just you. Now let's go in, it's getting chilly anyways." I grab the edge of my platform, swung myself over it and land on my feet on the ground, slightly bending in the knees. Owch, that stung. Ah well, been worse. As I look up, I see Hatake already standing there, watching me in an amused way. I pout a bit. I continue to the backdoor, Hatake leisurly walking behind me. I open the door, and walk in. Hatake closes it and I tug his sleeve. The thing I saw must be one of the cutest I ever saw. Uchiha-kun had nodded off, supporting himself to the sofa; Naruto-kun was on the couch, hugging Tsume, whose backpaw was pawing the air; Sakura-chan had dozed off on a futon I gave her; poor Mayu was sleeping with her head on Shiranui's lap. Yui and Shiranui were awake, and Yui smiled at me as we entered. Shiranui-kun rubbed the back of his head sheepishly, careful not to wake Mayu up. Yui motioned me towards Mayu, and I followed. We both lifted her up, and hoisted her on my back.

"She's like a little baby." I whispered and smiled at my sleeping "sister" as she murmured something about candy-canes.

"Yeah. But she's our little baby." Yui joked.

"Yeah, she has your eyes." I whispered back and Yui slapped my arm playfully. We walked the stairs up and into my room, deposited Mayu on my bed, and tucked her in. Yui decided to go and wash her teeth, so I went back downstairs. I saw Hatake lifting Naruto-kun up and carrying him on a futon. I walked to Sasuke-kun and lifted him up. He was sleeping surprisingly soundly, I don't think he woke up at all. He snuggled closer to me.

"Hahauen..." He murmured and I smiled. He was a normal kid, after all. I walked to a futon on Sakura's right side and deposited him on it, tucking him in. As a sudden impulse, I took Sakura's hand and put it into Sasuke-kun's. His hand curled around it, and I smiled at my deeds.

"Playing Cupid, eh?" I heard Shiranui-kun whisper and I nodded.

"They can always blame it on sleep. Well, good night." I whispered and smiled at the jounins. They nodded back, and I began climbing up the stairs. I arrived to my room, and saw Yui had already passed out like a light. On my bed. Ah, what the heck, let's make it even more crowded. I climbed on the bed, taking an extra blanket and a pillow, and passing out as soon as my head hit the pillow. This was a nice day...

* * *

**A/N: **Well, here was the second chapter. Kakashi got a little bold, ne? Anyways, that was deep. Even for me. Seems as though Kajitsu isn't such a horrible gal after all... Bye! And remember to wait for: 

**As Told By Kajitsu! **(echo)

Love, Tenshi-Hikari.


	4. Can getting jobs REALLY be this hard?

**A/N:** Hey! It's Tenshi here again. Here's the fourth installment of my story And, to all of you readers, I have decided NOT to add any chapters into this story, unless I get a minimum of **2** reviews. Not much to ask, right? Well, have fun!

**Disclaimer**: Oh, bollocks, you know this shit already. TT

* * *

"Oi, Kajitsu-san!" I heard someone say. I moaned and shifted in my sleep. I clutched to my pillow and went back to sleep. 

"Oi!" Or not. I cracked open my eye and waited my vision to clear up just a little bit. I looked, and right infront of me was Kakashi.

"Can you give me my arm back?" I looked down and... OH MY GOD! I snapped up and let go of his arm. I found myself sleeping on my livingroom sofa. I looked around, a faint blush on my cheeks.

"... How the heck did I get here?"

"You walk in your sleep." Kakashi bluntly said and rubbed his arm.

"You nearly cut off my circulation."

"Oh. Sorry." I swung my legs to the floor and scratched the back of my head while yawning. I looked at the clock nearby. 7:26. I let myself fall down again, accompanied with a slight grunt. Kakashi looked at me strangely.

"How can some people be up willingly at this time of the morning?" I groaned and pushed myself up once again.

"Not much of a morningperson, are you?" He asked. I didn't answer, just gave him the mother-of-all-deathglares-to-end-all-deathglares, and I swear, he scooted a good 2 inches away from me.

"I'm going to train." I mumbled and stood up, braiding my messy hair and took a small elastic band from a table. I walked upstairs, and to my closet. I grabbed my training-outfit: a black tanktop (never ever EVER use white colors when training!) and black sweatpants. I quickly changed into them and grabbed my bo. I sauntered to a small dojo-type room and took a stance. I did a few simple attacks, parried, jumped, ducked, rolled, kicked, punched, did some shadow-boxing (for those who don't know, I just hit air), kicked and punched a punchingbag, trained with a dao and sais. After I completed a complex combo of flips, slashes, rolls and thrusts and ended it with a yell, I felt someone behind me. I turned around and began attacking this person behind me, forcing him or her to back up. Sound of metal hitting metal echoed in the room, and I did a backflip and landed on a defensive position. The person behind me was Uchiha-kun. I collapsed onto the mat, breathing heavily and sweat running from practically every pore of my skin. Uchiha-kun smirked at me.

"Don't... Sneak... Up... On... Me... When... I'm... Training..." I breathed out and tried to stand up. No result. I cursed inwardly for driving myself too hard, and made a mental note _not_ to do this again.

"You're weak." He commented.

"Fuck you kid, I'm just a regular person, not a ninja. So basically, I'm stronger than your average, **NORMAL** person!" I shouted at him, and he looked somewhat taken back by my outburst, but regained his cool composure.

"Whatever. Breakfast is ready." He said and turned around, walking out of the door. I once again tried to get up, to no avail. I cursed with every damn curse I could think of and layed there, sprawled all over the floor. I think I layed there for about five minutes until someone else came in. It was Mayu.

"Mayu! Drink! Need! NOW!" I slurred and tried to swallow. Mayu just looked at me.

"Not again!" She asked/shouted and I grimaced. Oh no, not this again...

"I have told you time and again that you should know when to stop, when to let it be, but do you listen? NooOOoo, you just keep going! You should've learned your limitations by now! Haven't I told you that you shouldn't sparr at all? You should take a hobby that doesn't HURT YOU IN EVERY TURN!" She screamed at me. During her speech, I had rolled onto my stomach, and I was slowly crawling towards a waterbottle. As I reached it, I grabbed it, rolled back on my back and let the cool water flow down my parched throath, slowly reviving me.

"You stink. And in the ew-you-smell-meaning." She finally said.

"Thank you, captain Obvious." I muttered sarcastically and steadied myself on a wall, sitting against it. After drinking half of the bottle, I found enough strenght to get myself up. I still had to steady myself to a wall, though. My every freakin' muscle was currently mauling my brain and yelling "FUCK YOU I'm outta here!" very loudly. In lamemans terms: My body was aching all over. Mayu looked at me concerned, but I told her to go already. I limbed to the livingroom, and into the diningroom. Everyone looked at me, Uchiha-kun smirked at me and Yui-chan sighed and massaged her temples.

"Not again?"

"Yea, again and DON'T" I said when she opened her mouth to say something. "... Start the lecture, Mayu-chan gave me one. I'm hitting the showers." I turned around and after taking two steps, my legs gave up on me. I fell down with a thud, and grunted again. I felt someone putting his (I assumed it's a "he", since the arm was kinda... Well, more muscular than a female-arm) arm around me, taking my arm and putting it around his shoulders and lifted me up. I looked at the man. It was Kakashi-kun again. I raised an eyebrow at him but he ignored it.

"I'll help her to the bathroom, I'll be back in a few." We walked out of the kitchen (stumbled, fell and limbed in my case) and when we got far enough, I decided to ask.

"Why are you helping me? Not that I mind, but..."

"Why? Well... Maybe you can let me read Come Come Paradise later?" He asked and his visible eye showed that he was smiling. I hung my head in defeat.

"Is that all?" I asked in an irritated voice.

"Well, you looked like you needed help. Besides, I saw you training. Tomorrow will be pure hell for you."

"Don't remind me." I grumbled and put my hand on a doorhandle. I opened the door and Kakashi helped me in. He sat me down on the toilet, and just stood there. I looked at him.

"I can't take my clothes off if you're watching."

"Okay!" He turned around, his back facing me. And the eye twitched, again...

* * *

**"GET OUT YOU PERVERTED SCARECROW!" **I screamed and surprised the jounin with the sudden downpour of shampoo-bottles, mugs and various other hygiene-products, and with a large basin. I found enough strenght to push him out of the bathroom and closed the door, locking it. I steady myself against the door, and sigh. Sheesh. I look around, just to be on the safe side. I glance at the window. It has some weird plastic over it, it dims and distorts the view so that you can barely see through it. I turned on the shower, and again waited it to be the right temperature. I slipped in, with many ow's, whines and grunts. The warm water soothed my aching body a little, but it only took the edge off of the pain. It didn't take it away completely. At all. I enjoyed the warm water, and never wanted to leave. Alas, I had to. I closed it and got out of the shower. Thank God I had clean clothes hidden in the bathroom for these occasions. I put on clean underwear, and took out the pants. Simple, black, sweatpants with white trimming and pockets. I also took out a black tank-top with "Warning! If you can read this, you're too close!" Printed on it in small text and in red, across my chest. I dried my hair with the blowdrier, cracking my new hairbrush into the action. I got it decently dry and put it on a high ponytail. I drape my towel out to dry and open the window with great difficulty. I open the door and look to the ground. All the bath-products were assembled into the basin I threw out aswell. I smile slightly and lift it up, placing it on the clothwasher. I limp out of the bathroom, and go downstairs. I see Yui on the couch, Mayu on the floor playing with Tsume and Naruto. Sakura is next to Yui, and the others are no where in sight. Yui looks up from the book she was reading. 

"Feeling better?" She asked and smiled at me.

"A little bit, but I still feel like I've been swimming in a tub of starch." I joke and limb to the phone. It's about time mom would call... Ring! Ring! Bingo. I pick up the reciever.

"Moshi-moshi?"

"Hi dear! It's mom! How are you?"

"I'm fine. How's the visit?" I ask and sit on a chair next to the table.

"Oh it's fine! We're having so much fun! Could you believe it? Your cousin Aiko..." Mom babbled on about the family for _ever_, and I placed some uh-huh's, hmm's and oh's in. Eventually, I decided to ask her.

"Mom, why did you get two jounin and three genin to watch over me and the girls?" There was a slight pause.

"I'm sorry if we scared you dear, but we're still a little shaken up by the War of Sound. We just want you to be safe." She says and I feel a lot safer.

"Okay mom. I know you do. So when were you coming back?"

"We were thinking next thursday. Is that okay?" Mom asks.

"Yeah, you own this house, come and go as you please." I said and smiled. Mom laughed.

"Oh, your father wants to say something." I heard a faint rustle in the background.

"Kiki?"

"Hai, sore-ga watashi desu." I said and laughed a bit. Dad has called me Kiki as long as I can remember.

"How is it?"

"It's fine, dad. Me and the girls are holding a small slumber-party."

"Okay. There's..."

"Money in the top drawer. Yeah dad, I know. Oh, and, uh, I trained too hard again." I hear dad make a sound that was something like a sigh mixed with a chuckle.

"Again?"

"Yeah."

"Well, if you feel that you can't go to work tomorrow..."

"No, it's okay, I'm getting used to it."

"Okay. But you know where to call if you do."

"Yeah. Give mom a kiss from me, okay?"

"I will. See you later!"

"Laters!" I hang up the phone and smile to myself. I get up and go back to the livingroom. No one has really moved, Kakashi-kun and Shiranui-kun are back, along with Uchiha-kun. I wobble to Tsume and pet her. I grimace as I sit down, but I refuse to give in to the terrible pain!

"Yui-chan, Mayu-chan, we need to go shopping. And looking for jobs, our old ones are ending after next week."

"True. But I don't want to work where we always do." Mayu said and patted Tsume.

"Yeah, but where are we going to get any jobs?" Yui reasoned and closed her book.

"Well..." Shiranui-kun started and we all turned to him. Tsume started a tug-o-war with Naruto. She was winning.

"There are few jobs at the academy you could take. Secretaries, librarians, substitute teachers and errand-runners." Shiranui-kun listed and looked at us. We looked at eachother and smiled. Mayu bounced up and hugged Shiranui-kun.

"Thank you so much for the tip, Shiranui-kun!" She smiled and Shiranui-kun blushed. I looked at Yui, who grinned at me. I grinned back as Mayu turned to us.

"Come on, let's go! Before anyone else gets the jobs!" She grabbed my arm and tugged me up. Owie.

"Owch! Mayu!"

"Oh! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" She said and looked apologetic.

"It's okay." I said and smiled warmly. I glanced at Kakashi-kun, and saw that he was reading the new volume of Come Come Paradise. I looked at the cover, and saw a sticker on it: "Property of Kaba Kajitsu". He didn't...

"Kakashi-kun? Why are you reading my book?" I asked and approached him.

"Eh? Well, I thought this would be a nice pay for escorting you to the bathroom." He said and looked a bit flustered. I went to grab it, but he yanked it away.

"It's mine. I was reading it." I said in a venomous tone.

"Well I'm reading it now." He said and looked at it from a funny angle. He chuckled at something in the book. That did it. I took off some speed, put my left hand on his right shoulder and jumped. I easily grabbed the book, but there were few downsides: One: My body reminded me about how **PAINFUL** it was to move. Two: My , uh... Womanly assets were pressed against his face. I realized this too late, and grabbed the book, sliding down, taking a few steps back and covering my breasts, blushing beet-red. I feel so violated...! He was still in his position, hand held up and one in his pocket. He blinked, and...

**SPLOOOSH!**

He got a nosebleed. He tried to pinch his nose to stop it, but it took both of his hands to actually achieve the result he wanted.

"Oh come **ON**! It wasn't that great!" I shouted and looked away from him, still shielding my breasts. Oh, what a fun day this was turning out to be...

* * *

"Kakashi, is that blood on your mask?" 

"What happened, dude?"

Kakashi's ninja-friends decided to ask about the blood on his mask. He would not tell them, he would not tell them, he would _so not tell them_...!

"Well, it involved a pretty girl, her body and the latest issue of Come Come Paradise..." He started. And I was **not** going to let him finish it, so I punched him, hard.

"You stole my book, damnit!" Why that- Wait, did he say I was pretty? I felt my face heat up. Just a little. Kakashi's friends looked at my... Chest to see if it was really there. Kakashi slowly got up.

"That was uncalled for..." He muttered and rubbed his head.

"Fuck uncalled, you stole my book! And I can't believe you found it either!" I shouted again, glaring at him.

"Where did you hide it?" Mayu asked.

"... Meh undrerdrawrr..." I mumbled and felt my face heat up.

"Your underweardrawer?" Yui asked and arched her eyebrow at Kakashi.

"Say it a bit louder, why don't'cha?" I asked and clasped my hands on my cheeks, to dim down the blush. I heard sounds of slapping.

"Kakashi, you're brilliant!"

"Way to go, dude!" They are congratulating him? **They are congratulating him? **Why I oughtta... I slowly turned my head around to see the ninjas. Man, my deathglares are really powerful: They all took a step or two away from me. I turned around completely, and sighed, shoving my hands into my jacket pockets.

"Well, he did learn something today..." I said and eyed the ninjas.

"Huh?" Kakshi asked and looked at me. I put on my cutest i'm-so-delicate-face you can possibly think of.

"I'm softer than I look." I winked and turned to my friends. I grinned ferally, as a familiar sound reached my ears.

**Sploosh!**

"Help!"

"Kakashi, dude! Speak to me!"

"He's loosing blood!"

**Sploosh!**

"Now Inari has it too!" My friends looked at me as we high-fived.

"You're evil."

"I knooow... He started it anyways." And we three walked to the waiting room infront of the Hokage's office.

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Dear **loveable-M:** Now do you see why Genma's there? Kajitsu has such nice parents... 

Well, that was that. Read and Review! This has been another episode of:

**As Told By Kajitsu** (echo)

Ja ne! nn


	5. Matters of Life and Death

**T-H:** Hi ya'll! Here's zhe fifth chapter of my story. Enjoy! Oh, and remember, minimun 2 reviews on the chapter and we move on. _Savvy_? So, **review**! O.o

**Disclaimer:** ... Do we really need to go through this? **AGAIN?**

**On to the answers of the reviews: **

Dear **TheInflictedFinger:** Thank you so much for your review! It helped me more than you think: It helped me out of my writer's block! Thankyouthankyou**thankyou**! I'm glad you like this fic! People like you always make it worth writing this!

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"So you are all applying for small jobs here in the academy?" The Hokage, Tsunade-sama asked and looked at us. We nodded. 

"Yeah, it gets a little boring if you sit in the bookstore in the village, no offence to Kaede-san." Mayu said and I nodded. Tsunade smiled.

"So what jobs would you like?"

"Umm, I'm kinda the bookworm-type, so I could be either a librarian or a substitute teacher of things that don't require any use of chakra." I said and pointed at my self.

"I'm too hyper all the time, so I need to be on the move. A errand-girl, perhaps?" Mayu said, and sounded too mature for her personality.

"I need a human contact." Yui said as her only criteria, and Tsunade nodded. She shuffled some papers and pulled out three. She handed us the forms.

"Those can be arranged. Toya Yui-san, you can be my secretary. I need one, badly. Hanahime Mayu-san, we have a spot open for an inner-mail carrier. And Kaba Kajitsu-san, we currently need a librarian, and if we need a substitute teacher, we'll let you know. Fill those, give them back, and I hope to see you after next week." She said and smiled at us warmly. You know, it's really hard to think that this woman is actually over 50 years. I was filling my slip, and began chewing the end of my pen.

_Shuffle, shuffle, scritcha-scritcha... _

What the fuuck? I heard something. I glance around to see if anyone else heard it. Mayu and Yui both give me a look of "we-heard-it-too". I glance at Tsunade, and she gives a small, barely noticable nod towards a wallpanel. I secretly glance at it, straining my eyes and trying to get the best from my glasses. I saw small lines that indicated a secret, revolving door was the thing I was looking at. I heard some shuffling around from inside the panel. I didn't mind the fact that we were being watched, but...

"Will you guys **SHUT UP?**" I shouted, very, **very** annoyed and threw my pen towards the wallpanel with a quick flick of my hand. And I regretted it immedietly. Ow my arm, the pain, the _paaaain_... The pen actually penetrated the wood on the door and just... Was there, stuck in the door. I heard a yelp and reckognised it. My eye twitched again.

"Naruto-kun, what are you doing?" I asked and the panel revolved, making Naruto, Sakura and Sasuke fall on the ground. They all grinned sheepishly (save Sasuke) and I stood up (with some difficulty) and crossed my arms.

"Go before **I** go kung-fu on **you**." I said and glared.

"You can't. You're too sore." Sasuke said and seemed to be triumphant of his remark. Oh-ho, so that's the way you wanna play, eh?

"Did you notice something funny this morning, when you woke up?" I asked and smirked at his expression. It was the very epitome of pure horror. He was still holding Sakura's hand when I woke up in my livingroom couch. Aww...

" 'Cuz I think other people might wanna hear about it." I continued, and my grin got wider, if possible. He stared at me in shock, grabbed both his teammates and bolted right out of the door, ignoring their protests. Well, I think Sakura had no protests, Uchiha was practically hugging her. I turned back to the other women in the room, smiling like an idiot.

"What happened this morning?" Yui questioned with the 'tell-me-or-die' look.

"Due certain aspects of my situation, I am forced to hold any information concidering this morning as a secret." I said and lifted my left palm so that it was facing them.

"_Aand_ just **why** is _that_?" Yui asked, scarily advancing at me, eyes narrowed and crackling her knuckles. Eep.

"Because Uchiha-kun will slaughter me in many, many, horrible ways."

"And I won't?"

"Uh, good point..." I answered, slowly shrinking into nothingness as Yui seemed to grow. I heard Mayu telling Tsunade-sama "Not to worry, this is absolutely normal!" In cheery, sickeningly sweet voice, and so, they both settled to watch us. Goddamnit, women, I need **help!**

"**TELL. ME****. NOW.**" Yui growled at me. I swear, I just saw her battle-aura flare up like a small, furry... Thingamajicl drenched in oil, thrown into a pile of wood also drenched in oil and a match thrown in. It was not nice, folks! Scary as _ever!_

"Eh, uh, y'see, uh... Look, a flying pig!" I said and pointed at a random spot behind her. I have no idea why people keep falling for that, but hey, **not complaining! **As she turned around, I sprinted out of the room, as fast as my body allowed, and began running through the corridors. It was not long until I heard a warcry and a faint 'crash'. Uh, I think Tsunade-sama needs a new office door... No matter, breaking the door slowed her down.

"_Doke! Doke!_ This is a matter of life and death!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, dodging ninjas and random staff. After reaching a door, I swung it open and closed it behind me, locking it. Fingers crossed she didn't see that!

**WHAM! WHAM! **Damnit!

"Open up, Kiki, I just want to talk to you!" I heard Yui's falsly sweet voice from other side of the door. You know, the falsly sweet voice with a murderous undertone?

"No!" I shouted and looked around. Guess what room this is? Yeah, a jounin-chuunin-breakroom. Greeeaaat... Guess who were there? Uh-huh, Kakashi and Genma, along with other people I didn't know, and all the eyes were on me as I tried to block the door.

"Heey, how ya doin'?" I asked and waved my hand in a wide half-circle and as another series of whams shook the door, I had to put it back and lean into the door, just incase, ya know?

"Umm... Having a problem, there?" Kakashi asked. I see he cleaned his mask... My face had a 'no **DUH!**' look on it, and he nodded.

"Who did you piss off this time?" He asked and looked at me lazily.

"Well, came close to pissing off Uchiha, but in the end, pissed off Yui-chan." I said and smiled sweetly.

"Ooh, Kiikiii...!" She shouted and I felt as her assilants towards the door became more violent. Oh my God, _she's kicking the door!_ **PANICK! **I quickly ran away from the door, and ended up near some windows. I opened one, and looked down. Amen, a ledge! I jumped on it, just in time, too. The door was beginning to crack open. I ran on the ledge, and saw a tree. I launched myself at the nearest branch, my body nearly collapsing from the constant stinging and pain, and began to climb down it. I, eventually, reached the ground, and fell down with a thud. I groaned and swore, again, and saw a hole near a building, between two buildings, infact. It was covered by shrubbery, so I crawled in, barely fitting. Oh well, any harbour's good in a storm... I leaned against the wall, covered by shadows and the all-mighty shrubbery. I tried to even my breath and take my heart into control again. God damn, Yui is so scary when she's angry...

As I kept my eyes towards the tree and the ground through the shrubbery, I felt a hand pressed against my mouth. I let out a startled and muffled 'eep!' and my jumpy gaze fell on the 'assilant'. Three guesses who it was? Anyone? Hm? Yeah, that's right, it was Kakashi. Insert a big, fat, **WTF** here. I looked at him weirdly, silently questioning what the heck was he doin' here. He lifted his left index-finger up, around to the area where his mouth should be. He then put his middle-finger up, along with his index-finger, and closed his eye. Now, I'm not that familiar with the use of this 'chakra' these ninjas play with, but I think I reckognise it when someone's using it. It's kinda this giddy, tingly and itching feeling that surrounded me. I could tell that he was concentrating, I could sense it. Suddenly, I heard footsteps. Oh, please don't let Yui find me, ohpleaseohpleaseohplease...! She came near my hiding-place, moved the shrubbery, and stared right at the spot where I was. Oh GOD! NO! I'm too young to die and j  
ust where the heck is she going? She just released the shrubbery and went on her merry way. I glanced at Kakashi-then Yui's retreating back, then Kakashi, Yui's back, Kakashi, just empty air where Yui used to be... I felt Kakashi loosening the grip over my mouth and he lowered his left hand. Did I mention, the gap between the buildings was barely 3 feet? I understood that I fitted in, but how he squeezed himself in was beyond my comprehension. Eh, must be a ninja-thing. But it was still rather... _Uncomfortable _by the closeness in this small rathole I called safe-haven.

"What the hell?" I hissed and looked at Kakashi. He just glanced at me.

"Well, it still is my duty to protect you from any harm that might come to you..." He stated, talking to me like I was an idiot.

Silence.

I smacked my fist to my palm.

"Oh yeah!" I hissed out and Kakashi slapped his forehead, and then looked up as if praying patience from the gods. Hey, I'm not **that** hopeless!

... Right?

_... Right?_

"Hrm, Kakashi? You wouldn't happen to know a pressure-point that would make these muscle-ache go away?" I asked, clearing my throath. He looked at me and poked my shoulder, which, by the way, was painful as hell after I played monkey in that tree as I protected my poor soul from Yui's wrath, and I decided to return the favour by kicking his shin.

"Owch." He muttered and rubbed his sore shin.

"Yah, ditto over here." I said and pointed at myself.

"And as for your question, I do, but considering it's in a place you won't allow me to reach, I'd better take you to Tsunade." He said and turned completely towards me.

"Hey, what are you- **EEP!**" And there I was, on his arms (again) and on my way to Tsunade's office. She'd better heal me, too, or else...

* * *

There. Remembah, I live and feed on reviews. Don't kill me in starvation! o.o 

This has been another episode of

**As Told By Kajitsu! **

G'night!**  
**


	6. Scary perverts near the bathhouse

A/N: Here ya go. A new chappie. Screw the review-thing, I'll post 'em when I want to. T.T

Thanks to all the reviewers!

* * *

A soothing sensation entered my sore body and I sighed in relief. I had just been performed a 'chakra-enforced healing', as Tsunade-san put it. Basically, she had told me the following: She had gathered chakra into her hands, made the chakra to circulate around my body, soothing, relaxing and healing all my muscles. She might have told the same thing in gibberish, because I really don't get the whole 'chakra-is-your-ultimate-friend'-stuff, but again, not complaining. I felt better I had felt in years, like I had just had a great massage. You all know what I mean, yeah? 

"That's it." I heard Tsunade say and I snapped my eyes open.

"It is?"

"It is."

"... Oh." I said and hopped up, stretching myself and testing my muscles. And I mean really testing them, stretching my body to its limits.

"You know, you don't have to wreck your body that soon." Tsunade-san commented and squinted at me.

"Oh, sorry." I looked around and scratched my neck.

"Well, uh… Thanks. I'll be off then." I said and waved, turning and walking to the now-fixed door. How did they fix it that quickly? Hmm…

"Where?"

"Huh?"

"I asked 'where'." Kakashi repeated and glanced at me, leaning to the wall and his hands in his pockets. Why does _he_ look so cool when he does that? Damn. I'm such a long way from that…

"I'm gonna face the music." I said and slipped out of the door.

God, that was such a cliché!

But oh boy, was I in trouble with Yui now. The only way for me to survive was duking it out with her, and that was never too pretty. Did I mention Yui is a karateka? No? Well, she is. Did I mention that she can break bricks with the back of her hand? And 7 planks stacked? No? Well, she can. Have you **any** idea **what-so-ever** what her karate-chops to do human bones? No? Well **I** do. And I **don't** want it to happen to me. Again. I mean, yeah, now that I'm healed an' all I can dodge about 73 percent of her kicks and punches, but the rest remaining 27 percent hurt like hell when they make contact. Sigh. Great going, me! So why do I bother with her? Like I said, we're sisters, if not by blood, but sisters nevertheless. And sisters stick together! Through thick and thin. Although, I don't wanna hurt her, I don't even know why she got so upset about anyways. Guess my slightly torn state of mind showed very clearly on my face…

"Oi. You okay?" I heard his voice, I lifted my head a little and offered a small smile. A hollow one, but a smile.

"Yeah."

"You don't look like it." He pushed further. Man, I have no idea why I keep confiding in him!

"I dunno what to do. I dun wanna hurt her, but I will protect myself…" I trailed off. I heard him sigh slightly. The rest of the way we walked in silence as I mulled over my current situation. I really, really need to talk to Yui-chan about this.

…. Talk, schmalk, I'll let my fists do that part. I start to walk around aimlessly, putting my hands behind my head and humming something random.

"Where are you going?"

"Nuh-where."

"… Aren't you going to find your friend?"

"Yup."

"…. Do you know where she is?"

"Nope." I heard a groan and a slight slap. Then some mutters. Something about a stupid girl…

… I'll let it slide.

… This time.

Don't look at me like that, I could totally kick his ass!

… Okay, maybe not. Forget I said anything!

"Well do you know where she could be?"

"Nooo idea." Another groan. I swear, I heard him trying to stop himself from hurting me. Hee hee hee… I dig through my jacket and my hand reaches the all too familiar shape. I pull it out and flip it open. Now where was I? Oh yeah! Sakuya was in a bathhouse, when Hiroshi entered… Oh ho. Let's see what happens next. I keep reading, putting my left hand into my pockets and keeping Come Come Paradise open and up with my right hand. I felt something warm pressing closer… And closer… And…

"You…" I put my left hand on his chest, reading my beloved book all the way.

"Are invading my personal space. Arm length…" I pushed him. Hard. And whaddaya know, it actually worked!

"Away." He stumbled slightly, but quickly recovered from it. Drats. Again.

"Come ooon! It was in such a good spot when you yanked it awayyy!" He whined and tried to look cute, which wasn't really working.

_Well, he **is** kinda_- **SHUT IT! **I donot need another one of these me vs. my inner voice convos!

"Kakashi, no."

"Pleaaaa-aaase?" Okay, it was funny the first time, but now this is getting irritating!

"Kakashi! You're a grown man! Stop whining!"

"But I was paid to protect you!"

"STOP GROVELING! IT'S MY BOOK AND I'M READING IT NOW!" I clearly and calmly (note the sarcasm) stated it to him and calmly (briskly) walked away, constantly bombarded with Kakashi's constant whining.

"Eeheeheehee…"

"What the-" A freaky giggle stopped me in my tracks. I turned my head towards the building. The Konoha Bathhouse. I glanced downwards. The women's side. Even more down. A man hunched over "hidden" (plain sight if ya ask me) at the corner, between the buildings and peering into the women's side. He looked like an old fart. Seriously. I walked up to him as quietly as I could (he's a ninja and didn't see me coming. Snort, I'm _sooo_ impressed.) and put my foot to the side of his face.

"Oi. What do you think you're doing?" He stopped giggling and slowly turned his head towards me. I took my foot offa him only to reveal his face. He was drooling.

… EW.

I took a few (many) steps back and hoped Kakashi was there to help me. Without me even noticing, the guy who was peeking into the dressing room was right in front of me. And as a first reaction, I yelped and jumped the hell back!

"Oh! A perfect woman! Such figure! Such grace! And the angelic face!" Excuse me? He then spotted my book. His eyes widened. Oh good god, not him too.

"I swear, if you start acting like Kakashi…" I raised my fist up, ready to hit him.

"You… You read that book?" He asked, his voice quivering. I quirked an eyebrow at him.

"No, I'm just carrying it around for fun. Of course I'm reading it!" He was silent for a while. I was already willing to believe that he experienced a meltdown. But no. No such luck for me.

"OH! I'm so happy! Such a wonderful woman is reading that book!" And while I was still trying to grasp what the hell that old geezer was trying to say, Kakashi appeared next to me.

"Oi, why'd you- Oh, hello, Jiraya-sama!" He greeted and the old man seized his freakish rambling, staring at Kakashi. I was currently shifting my gaze between them, trying to figure out the damned connection here! Owch, my neck.

"Kakashi, just for the record, who's the ol' perverted geezer?" I asked, pointing at the man. Who was staring at me. The uncomfortable way. Like he was undressing me in his mind. Eww…

"Ah, this is Jiraya-sama!" The scarecrow exclaimed, smiling at me. Uh, at least I think he was smiling. Damn that stupid mask of his…

"Jiraya-sama, this is Kajitsu-chan!" … Did he just say chan?

"And to what, pray you tell, does that chan refer to?" Wow, I didn't know I could growl. Ah well, you learn something new every day.

"Wouldn't you like to know, Kajitsu-_chan_?" He still smiled but patted my head, you know, for being a whopping inch or two taller than me.

"Issunboshi." (One-inch boy, direct reference to the thingie below the belt.) I state and whap his hand away. Out of the corner of my eye I see him twitch.

"Jyajya uma." (Tomboy) He states. Oh-ho, so you're gonna play it like that, eh?

"Chimpara!" (Prick, Osaka-dialect)

"Sentako itay!" (Flat-chested, literally "ironing board") Oi! I may not have the biggest hooters around but that was one helluva insult!

"Kuso baka yarou!" (Fucking idiot!)

"Onnabe!" (Lesbian!)

"Okama!" (Gay or faggot)

"Otemba!" (A very rude version of tomboy)

"Ookiosewada!" (Up yours!) I accented this happy greeting by flipping him off. He crossed his arms, and I could tell, he was loosing his cool. Ho ho ho…

"Jigoku e ike!" (Go to hell!)

"I would, but I'm already there! And I am **not** flat-chested!" I crossed my arms, unconsciously pushing my chest up.

"I don't think you're flat-chested." Jiraya waved from the sidelines. Some people were snickering at us and/or smiling a slightly troubled smile.

"Urusai, hentai jiji!" Wow, I do growl! And it is effective. Oh my gawd, I have discovered a new way to intimidate people! I turned my head towards Kakashi to continue our little, sensible discussion, but then it hit me: I was supposed to deal with peepin' tom over there.

"What **were** you doing over there?" I whipped my head towards this guy Jiraya. He twitched and tried to look innocent. One patent-pending death glare, courtesy of Kajitsu, coming up!

"Well, now that you mentioned it…" He straightened up and whaddaya know, he looked almost like a human being. Note the almost over here.

"I'm doing some research for my next novel. You are reading one part of the series." … Reading whatsa from where now? I look at the book. Then Jiraya. Then the book. And then Jiraya.

"Soo, you were doing research." I stated more than asked. He nodded. I blinked.

"Okay, don't let me stop ya!" I grinned and offered my hand for him to shake. He looked perplexed. Hm, can't imagine why… I really can't! He then took my hand and shook it. I let go and turned to Kakashi, who looked like the very epitome of confusion. Okay, let's make it a third confused one.

"… What?" The both males begun motioning wildly with their hands.

"But you…"

"Just now…"

"Pissed as hell…"

"Scary…"

"Very happy right now…"

"How can you…"

"But we just…"

"This quickly…"

"Unhuman…"

"Okay, both of you, **STOP**!" I shouted and slapped their hands away. Especially Jiraya's, they were getting too close to my chest for comfort.

"I am a WO-MAN. It means that I am entitled to switch moods. And honestly, I have no idea how or why they switch so often, and to be frank with you, it even scares me. You two, be happy to be men. You get off easily." I said and turned around, walking away from them, muttering something about complete idiots. Don't ask, even I don't know what I mutter.

I said don't ask.

I flipped open my book, and lo: I managed to read two lines. And then, I had to dodge.

And I mean dodge, had I not my head would've met Mr. Concrete wall and they might have tested just which was stronger: My skull or the wall. I looked at my assailant, and realized that she had made a dent into the wall. My eye is twitchiiing… At this rate, my face-muscled will be able to lift a bloody human being up.

"Eh heh… Hiya, Yui!" Smile, and maybe she won't notice your fear…

Fat chance.

"Oh Kajitsuuu…. I believe we have something to discuss about, no?" She grinned manically. Hoo boy, here we go…

"I dunno. Maybe?"

"Maybe?" She crackled her knuckles.

"Eeep! I mean yes!"

"You wouldn't happen to have any ideas on how we should talk about it?" … Lemme think… How 'bout, you stay, I run? I bring my book up and begin reading it.

"None that I can think of." Instincts kick in, and I dodge. I feel some air whiz past my left ear. I dodge again, this time air near right ear. Oooh, that rhymed.

"I have one suggestion." I hear Yui say, and I swear, I can hear her smirk. And I think I know what she means…

"Oh for the love of Bob, will I ever be able to read this book?" I exclaim dramatically and fold it back into my jacket.

"Who's Bob?" I hear Kakashi ask. Umm, I have something going here, okay?

"No. And Bob says you should stop saying that." Yui says, her face completely blank.

"Who's Bob?"

"Yeah, yeah, but when was the last time any of us ever listened to Bob?"

"Who's Bob?"

"… Good point."

"Who's Bob?"

"Yeah, I thought so too."

"Who is Bob?" Yui and me both turn our heads towards Kakashi and Jiraya. Then we look at each others and simultaneously, put our arms around the air, as if there was a person standing over there.

"This is Bob." Yui says and points at the air.

"Yeah, he's our conscience. We never listen to him, so he gets pretty peeved most of the time." I continue and point at the air as well. Man, where the heck are the cameras when you need one? Their faces were priceless! They looked so damn scared! Haha! Hahahahaha!

"Where were we?" I asked and pretended to lean on "Bob".

"The discussion."

"Oh yeah. So, if were going to discus- Shut up Bob." I smacked the air. Yui winced at this.

"Owch."

"Yeah, but he's used to it. 'Nyways, if we do discuss about this, shouldn't my dojo be a lot better place than a common street?" Did I mention the two men were really starting to look bothered by us? Hee hee hee…

"Yeah, good idea! We'll just have to find Mayu as well… We need a judge."

"What, Bob ain't enough?"

"Noo, Bob would just bitch about us fighting again. Mayu's better, no offence, Bob." Yui lifted her hand up as to say she means no harm.

"Hi guys!"

"Well speak of the devil." Yui mused aloud and waved at Mayu. She skipped towards us and quirked an eyebrow to Kakashi and Jiraya.

"What's with them?" She asked when she got near us.

"We told them about Bob." I explained.

"Yeah, I don't think they see him." Yui frowned slightly. I swear, we would make perfect actresses. Well, it's always comforting to know some occupation one might try…

"But anyways, me and Yui are going to talk things straight at the dojo. Coming?" Mayu sighed and shook her head.

"Your talking is always fighting. Why?"

"Because we lack verbal talent?" Yui suggested, only to receive a nasty glare from Mayu. Eech, she can be scary too you know.

"Fine, I'll do it. Let's go." Mayu said in a defeated tone.

"Coming, Hatake?" I asked, knowing the answer. He didn't have much of a choice, did he? As we walked towards my home, both Kakashi and Jiraya followed us. I have no idea why Jiraya was following us, but what ever.

Now, I'm quite sure you all are wondering who or what this mysterious "Bob" is. He is actually Mayu's, Yui's and my invention. He is the personification of our conscience. Don't ask about the name, it was something random Mayu thought up. Anyways, Bob manifested himself more when we were smaller. He was our imaginary friend. Since we've grown older, he doesn't manifest himself like he did when we were smaller, but we do joke around about him. This imaginary friend-business is a well-kept secret between us. We all kinda still believe in him, even though we're over twenty. He helps me solve my insecurities every now and then. And in a way, don't we all have someone imaginary to help us? Like just a funny image of us doing something in super-deformed-look or generally imagining things?

…. No?

…. Errm…

… Forget I said anything.

* * *

Yui charged at me after a long, ten-minute intense battle. Shit! What do I do? **WHADDLE I DO?** I suddenly grab her fist, the front of her gi and flip her whole body over myself, sending her crashing down on the tatami-mat. Reflexes, I thank you most highly! I caught my breath while wiping my forehead with the back of my hand. I put up my fists and wait for her to get up and we can start again. But you know what she does? She swipes my feet from under me and I crash down on the mat, right next to her!

"A-howwww!" I whine and cough. We're both laying on the mat, breathing hard. The audience (consisting of Mayu, Kakashi, Shiranui, Jiraya (oh, he's doing "research". Perverted git.), Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura) hold their breath as we keep silent. Yui let's out a chocked giggle, and I try to suppress my laugh. Finally, we both start laughing our heads off, without a damn reason, just laughing for the heck of it!

"I can't- I can't brrreath! Hahahaha!" Yui gasps between laughs.

"Ow-Haha! Owww- Hahahah! My t-tummy! Hahahahaa!" I choke out and double over, clutching my stomach. Oh man, laughing is so going to be my cause of death! Hahahahaha! People are looking at us strangely, though Mayu is laughing with us. Note, **with **us. Not **at** us. I manage to control my laughter, even if just a little.

"So, Yui.. Hahaha! Why did you get so-heehee! Miffed at me?" I say and just lay there, looking at the ceiling.

"Ahahahaha! Well, hehee, I was feeling a little-haha! Bored and I wanted to- To fight someone! Hahaha!" She laughed and writhed about, clutching her stomach. She **WHAT?**

"So you just got angry with me because you felt like fighting?" I asked, breathing heavily.

"Yup! Hahaha!"

"Hahaha!" I fake-laughed and then sprung on my feet, taking a naginata off the wall. Yui sprang up herself and started to run.

"Get back here so I can skewer you!" I flailed the naginata around and charged at Yui.

"AAAIIEEEE!" She yelped and ran towards Mayu, who seemed absolutely horrified.

"No! Go away! Go away! Not here, _nooooooo!_"

"BOTH OF YOU, GET! BACK! HERE!" I scream as they flee my crazed flailing of my precious naginata. The ninjas in the room jumped away from our present course of headless running and I followed my oh-so precious Celestial Sisters, getting quite ready to make shish-kebab out of 'em. But hey, don't worry, this is completely normal!

Heere girlies, here girly-girly-girlies!

…. Insert maniacal, insane laughter here.

* * *

Yep, that's that. I did edit this earlier, but, uh... The internet took a freaky loop and it didn't save. So there. But this has been another episode of 

**As Told By Kajitsu!**

Good night.


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